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“Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and cannot remain silent”

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Posted 07-28-2011 at 03:28 PM by xLittlexCMxPunkx

Dear Blog,

My family confuses the living DAYLIGHTS out of me. OK so I was complaining that i have not seen my friends in like a few weeks since everyone's been out of town, having relationships, and getting jobs. Well, I'm pretty much stuck at home saving for a bass. I went out for coffee with my cousin/godmother a week ago and all hell broke loose. EVERY SINGLE TIME i go with her, i end up crying because she thinks something is wrong with me. Every time! Just because I don't want to hang around my friends all the time doesn't mean that's a bad thing. If you don't take one or two days to ease down and take care of yourself, then you'll go insane. All I want is maybe a couple days during the week with my friends, sleepovers are cool too, but it's like confusing since my friends are moving on with their lives and i'm not really doing the same. I don't have a crush, well except this dude at mcdonalds but i don't know him at all. I don't have a complete group of friends like my classmates do since my friends can't co-exist. I got band camp in a couple weeks but i can still hang out after it. My cousin went to the extreme that i'm a loner and she's concerned about me. Ok so let me get this straight. I tutor, I'm in band, I talk to people in class, i have a lunch table, i have a twitter, cellphone, and facebook that i use. I keep in touch with my friends in some way. After all of that, am I really a loner? Should you be concerned? NO! YOU SHOULDN'T. Also, just because I wanna take up another instrument doesn't mean I'm isolating myself from my friends. IT'S CALLED BALANCE! It's like a chemistry with trying to balance it even with every aspect of life. I'm sick of this! I can't go see one of my favorite bands down-town this Sunday because no one can take me and my friends have never heard of this band which really sucks! I have a different personality and things I wanna do but that shouldn't make me a loner. Also, what if I do want to make a career out of music in the future? YOU CAN'T STOP ME. I'll still go to college no doubt. Just stop trying to say that i'm going to be anti social and everything else! I'm a good kid but just a shy one that just doesn't ask for much in life! I know a bunch of people who play many different instruments and they've got some good social lives too! Why can't you understand that I want to learn how to play the bass guitar? You don't understand how much music has changed my life in more positive than negative ways and you never freakin' will! Ugh! I'm just gonna blast some Megadeth on my way to my flute lesson soon to make me feel better. It usually does the trick

Christina <3
Posted in About Me!, Life!
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