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  #161  
Old 06-24-2017, 08:13 AM
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hey guys, sorry I haven't been on here a lot lately, I'm kinda stressed because I need to finish things up in the coming months and it feels like I need to do everything at once right now >< (which is why I'm here now... totally not studying or anything XD)

@kelann1027 I'm so sorry to read about your miscarriage!

@alereine welcome! (I know, late, I'm sorry) My name is Joyce and I love reading fanfic too (though I like writing even more). I've recently started reading books again though since I'm doing an internship at a publishing company and get free books that they publish

@fragilebeauty I noticed you're deputy now? what did I miss?



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  #162  
Old 07-04-2017, 01:02 AM
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I have never felt so alone! I lost a part of me when I found out my baby was dead!! I put on a smile..that shit is fake...I just hate right now..Am I ok?? I hate this...



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  #163  
Old 07-05-2017, 07:39 AM
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@Vergina I'm just taking over while Rute has a little break..

@kelann1027 I'm sorry your going through this.. keep chatting to me as you need to


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  #164  
Old 07-08-2017, 09:34 AM
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welcome back Hope all is well



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  #165  
Old 07-08-2017, 09:35 AM
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Oh kelann1027 I am so sorry....



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  #166  
Old 07-08-2017, 10:45 AM
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@kelann1027 I know we've PMed about this, but I have been thinking of you, and all you can do is take some time and heal, and NEVER blame yourself. I lost my baby 3 years ago, and it still KILLS me. I wrote a poem and hung it on my wall, and I look at it literally every day. I never forget, and that's all we can do for our little angel babies. Just keep their memory alive, because they matter, and keep strong, because they're watching. I had a cousin just give birth to her baby at 28 weeks, because they couldn't find the heartbeat, and she's a complete mess right now. It JUST happened on the 30th of last month, and I've been trying my hardest to be here for her, but there's not much you can say to someone to make them feel any better at all, after they've lost a child. & while it effects the daddy's too of course, the moms are naturally hit the hardest, because we were the ones carrying the babies. We were the ones responsible for making sure they get here safely, and we always blame ourselves when they don't, but the fact of the matter is that it happens to 1 in 4 pregnant women. That's a HUGE number of women. & it can't be all of our faults. It's just one of the nightmares of this world that we'll never be able to understand. I am sending good vibes your way and keeping you in my thoughts though, love. Just don't try and rush the healing process and beat yourself up over why you're not feeling any better. I did something really stupid, when it hit the year mark, after I lost my baby, and that's something I'll never forgive myself for, but I just couldn't cope with it at the time, and all I could do, after I realized what I had done was not a solution, was pick myself back up and just try and force myself to be okay. But, it's the HARDEST thing I've ever been through, which is really saying a lot, because I've been through some messed up crap. Anyway, I just don't want to see anyone else get to that point. So, I promise you that I'm only a message away if you ever want to talk, vent, or just whatever. I'm here girl. & I wish I could take it all away, but I can't. I'll be a friend though, if ever you may need me. <3 <3



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  #167  
Old 07-08-2017, 04:24 PM
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@kelann1027: You are an amazingly strong person for dealing with your situation, not everyone is able to live on every day after a loss like that. You will always remember your baby and you will keep being strong It's hard at times but if you need anyone to talk to you have your family and friends, online and offline Message me if you ever need anything!

A small paranoid rant about today: I finally signed my contract at work a few days back, and in the hygiene/health and safety section, our main boss explained that if we're physically sick (vomiting/diarrhea, which of those today I have been vomiting since the morning) we cannot work because it can easily be passed on to customers (and I deal with serving food, drinks, and shisha, all of which the customer either eats, drinks, or smokes and I come into contact with those as an employee). I have been feeling like crap since Thursday, when I started my shift at four but the other manager was the only manager in and he let me start work at 5:30 because it was clear I was ill (wasn't vomiting at this point though).
Yesterday I managed to work from 4 pm somehow, which is fine, but I was feeling weak by the end of the night.
This morning I wake up, my boyfriend asks me several times if I can actually even work because I'm weak, can't stand up properly, and feel sick. I can't call from my phone and he's gone for the day so before he leaves I decide to call up the manager who is the co-owner, and he says to call the manager in the restaurant as he's in another restaurant he has two cities away. So I call up the manager in the restaurant where I work, and I ask if I can start at 1:30pm instead of 11am (keeping in mind that I got home at 2am from my shift yesterday and only had 5-6 hours sleep and had been ill for days anyway). He said no, 11 o'clock, and I said I'll try.
I started getting ready, or at least tried to, but seriously couldn't manage it. I text him explaining that I'd been vomiting and couldn't make it to work, and that it would be breaching my contract if I came in with a physical illness. I don't about you guys, but if I was eating in a restaurant and I saw that an employee is barely standing on their feet, can't perform their job properly, and is making regular visits to the toilet, I wouldn't want that person serving me and I'd think they wouldn't be in a state to even work that day. In the contract I mentioned earlier, the main boss explained as well, that if an customer gets ill because of the waiting staff, the company cannot be sued, but the employee can be (which would be me). I just got this job the week before, they know I need the money, but I clearly explained in the text why I can't work for safety issues.
He doesn't call back or reply, so my bf leaves and I've been at home all day, barely standing, not eating because it makes me feel sick, and thinking over this whole situation.
I messaged a girl on facebook that I worked with and I told her what happened, and she told me that there are too many staff anyway, a lot of people got early or longer breaks, and that three guys who we work with turned up late and their shifts were cancelled. She even told me that the manager in the restaurant doesn't understand why the main boss put so many people on shifts today as only about two thirds of the staff were actually needed. She also said that the manager in the restaurant said that he wants to fire me because I let him down, and that she heard him talking on the phone to someone (who I presume is the main boss) and she heard him say that I was supposed to be in for 11, called at 10 to ask if I can start later at 1:30, but never turned up. Mind you, the main boss is in charge of who gets fired and who doesn't, and I happen to get along with him very well, and I know for a fact if I have a shift tomorrow or they want to speak to me, he will not fire me because he told me himself that if we are physically sick, we cannot handle any food or drinks (and that's what my job depends on).
I had no way of getting an appointment with a doctor today to even get a doctor's note, and I can't get to the hospital as I haven't even been paid from this job yet, so I don't have money for travel (parents won't help me anymore either, and since this is my first job in two months, my bf has been paying every single bill we have and paying off our debts little by little). I'll text the main boss tonight when my bf is back, and I'm going to ask him what time I'm in tomorrow. I'm still going to be ill, but I'm going to defend myself about today because I know I'm in the right.
Sorry, I just really needed to write this out somewhere



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  #168  
Old 07-09-2017, 07:48 PM
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@kelann1027: You are an amazingly strong person for dealing with your situation, not everyone is able to live on every day after a loss like that. You will always remember your baby and you will keep being strong It's hard at times but if you need anyone to talk to you have your family and friends, online and offline Message me if you ever need anything!

A small paranoid rant about today: I finally signed my contract at work a few days back, and in the hygiene/health and safety section, our main boss explained that if we're physically sick (vomiting/diarrhea, which of those today I have been vomiting since the morning) we cannot work because it can easily be passed on to customers (and I deal with serving food, drinks, and shisha, all of which the customer either eats, drinks, or smokes and I come into contact with those as an employee). I have been feeling like crap since Thursday, when I started my shift at four but the other manager was the only manager in and he let me start work at 5:30 because it was clear I was ill (wasn't vomiting at this point though).
Yesterday I managed to work from 4 pm somehow, which is fine, but I was feeling weak by the end of the night.
This morning I wake up, my boyfriend asks me several times if I can actually even work because I'm weak, can't stand up properly, and feel sick. I can't call from my phone and he's gone for the day so before he leaves I decide to call up the manager who is the co-owner, and he says to call the manager in the restaurant as he's in another restaurant he has two cities away. So I call up the manager in the restaurant where I work, and I ask if I can start at 1:30pm instead of 11am (keeping in mind that I got home at 2am from my shift yesterday and only had 5-6 hours sleep and had been ill for days anyway). He said no, 11 o'clock, and I said I'll try.
I started getting ready, or at least tried to, but seriously couldn't manage it. I text him explaining that I'd been vomiting and couldn't make it to work, and that it would be breaching my contract if I came in with a physical illness. I don't about you guys, but if I was eating in a restaurant and I saw that an employee is barely standing on their feet, can't perform their job properly, and is making regular visits to the toilet, I wouldn't want that person serving me and I'd think they wouldn't be in a state to even work that day. In the contract I mentioned earlier, the main boss explained as well, that if an customer gets ill because of the waiting staff, the company cannot be sued, but the employee can be (which would be me). I just got this job the week before, they know I need the money, but I clearly explained in the text why I can't work for safety issues.
He doesn't call back or reply, so my bf leaves and I've been at home all day, barely standing, not eating because it makes me feel sick, and thinking over this whole situation.
I messaged a girl on facebook that I worked with and I told her what happened, and she told me that there are too many staff anyway, a lot of people got early or longer breaks, and that three guys who we work with turned up late and their shifts were cancelled. She even told me that the manager in the restaurant doesn't understand why the main boss put so many people on shifts today as only about two thirds of the staff were actually needed. She also said that the manager in the restaurant said that he wants to fire me because I let him down, and that she heard him talking on the phone to someone (who I presume is the main boss) and she heard him say that I was supposed to be in for 11, called at 10 to ask if I can start later at 1:30, but never turned up. Mind you, the main boss is in charge of who gets fired and who doesn't, and I happen to get along with him very well, and I know for a fact if I have a shift tomorrow or they want to speak to me, he will not fire me because he told me himself that if we are physically sick, we cannot handle any food or drinks (and that's what my job depends on).
I had no way of getting an appointment with a doctor today to even get a doctor's note, and I can't get to the hospital as I haven't even been paid from this job yet, so I don't have money for travel (parents won't help me anymore either, and since this is my first job in two months, my bf has been paying every single bill we have and paying off our debts little by little). I'll text the main boss tonight when my bf is back, and I'm going to ask him what time I'm in tomorrow. I'm still going to be ill, but I'm going to defend myself about today because I know I'm in the right.
Sorry, I just really needed to write this out somewhere
You are right. Most places say after 3 call outs then you need a note. I haven't worked in 3 years and it sucks. I am sure things will work out for you. Good luck!



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  #169  
Old 07-09-2017, 07:50 PM
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Hi Fox,
How was ya weekend? Today I went to a Magic Card Tournament. I didnt play but I get free cards. I hope everyone had a nice weekend!



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  #170  
Old 07-09-2017, 07:52 PM
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@kelann1027 I know we've PMed about this, but I have been thinking of you, and all you can do is take some time and heal, and NEVER blame yourself. I lost my baby 3 years ago, and it still KILLS me. I wrote a poem and hung it on my wall, and I look at it literally every day. I never forget, and that's all we can do for our little angel babies. Just keep their memory alive, because they matter, and keep strong, because they're watching. I had a cousin just give birth to her baby at 28 weeks, because they couldn't find the heartbeat, and she's a complete mess right now. It JUST happened on the 30th of last month, and I've been trying my hardest to be here for her, but there's not much you can say to someone to make them feel any better at all, after they've lost a child. & while it effects the daddy's too of course, the moms are naturally hit the hardest, because we were the ones carrying the babies. We were the ones responsible for making sure they get here safely, and we always blame ourselves when they don't, but the fact of the matter is that it happens to 1 in 4 pregnant women. That's a HUGE number of women. & it can't be all of our faults. It's just one of the nightmares of this world that we'll never be able to understand. I am sending good vibes your way and keeping you in my thoughts though, love. Just don't try and rush the healing process and beat yourself up over why you're not feeling any better. I did something really stupid, when it hit the year mark, after I lost my baby, and that's something I'll never forgive myself for, but I just couldn't cope with it at the time, and all I could do, after I realized what I had done was not a solution, was pick myself back up and just try and force myself to be okay. But, it's the HARDEST thing I've ever been through, which is really saying a lot, because I've been through some messed up crap. Anyway, I just don't want to see anyone else get to that point. So, I promise you that I'm only a message away if you ever want to talk, vent, or just whatever. I'm here girl. & I wish I could take it all away, but I can't. I'll be a friend though, if ever you may need me. <3 <3
Thank you, This wasn't the first time I lost a baby. I miscarried 7 years ago too. It's harder now because 2 of my friends are having babies. One of my friends is very worried about me. I am just trying to kepp busy right now if I can. How was ya weekend?



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  #171  
Old 07-09-2017, 10:29 PM
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Thank you, This wasn't the first time I lost a baby. I miscarried 7 years ago too. It's harder now because 2 of my friends are having babies. One of my friends is very worried about me. I am just trying to kepp busy right now if I can. How was ya weekend?
We had a pretty good weekend. My husband worked all weekend, but we still had a little bit of family time, between tonight and last night. He was off Friday though, so we definitely had at least one good day! How was yours? Any plans for the week? I'm going to the pool with my friend tomorrow, and we're bringing our boys. They're 5 days apart!! & they both love going to the pool, so it should be nice! Kyle and I are sitting down together right now to watch tonight's episode of Big Brother that I recorded, since I just got Levi to sleep!



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  #172  
Old 07-09-2017, 10:59 PM
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We had a pretty good weekend. My husband worked all weekend, but we still had a little bit of family time, between tonight and last night. He was off Friday though, so we definitely had at least one good day! How was yours? Any plans for the week? I'm going to the pool with my friend tomorrow, and we're bringing our boys. They're 5 days apart!! & they both love going to the pool, so it should be nice! Kyle and I are sitting down together right now to watch tonight's episode of Big Brother that I recorded, since I just got Levi to sleep!
Tomorrow we are going to the museum they have butterfly's there right now. My hubby has to go to class for 5 30 pm tomorrow night. I hope you have fun!



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  #173  
Old 07-09-2017, 11:38 PM
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Originally Posted by kelann1027 View Post
Tomorrow we are going to the museum they have butterfly's there right now. My hubby has to go to class for 5 30 pm tomorrow night. I hope you have fun!


It should be a decent day, I'm just hoping the boys don't get fussy! I hope you guys have a good time though. It sounds like you will. (:


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  #174  
Old 07-15-2017, 02:30 PM
kelann1027 kelann1027 is offline
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So, I feel cold right now..lol..I had my first period since I lost my baby and now I feel cold when touched but I have a fever..I still dont know how to feel but me and Craig watched 3 Resident Evil movies last night..It was fun but I talk way to much when the movie is playing..lol..How is everyone else doing?



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  #175  
Old 07-21-2017, 10:34 PM
kelann1027 kelann1027 is offline
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I am now on the HCG diet. Starting Sunday I can only intake 500 Calories a day for 21 days and can only eat what it says too. From 22 days until 44 days I can then start to eat all healthy foods but only intake between 1,500 - 2,000 calories day. After this I just keep eating healthy with maybe 1 cheat food a week. I did this diet 9 years ago and lost 20 pounds. How is everyone else doing?



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  #176  
Old 07-22-2017, 11:51 AM
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Originally Posted by kelann1027 View Post
I am now on the HCG diet. Starting Sunday I can only intake 500 Calories a day for 21 days and can only eat what it says too. From 22 days until 44 days I can then start to eat all healthy foods but only intake between 1,500 - 2,000 calories day. After this I just keep eating healthy with maybe 1 cheat food a week. I did this diet 9 years ago and lost 20 pounds. How is everyone else doing?
wow that sounds harsh! only 500 calories a day?! I could never do that XD I love food too much but I really admire you for doing that! Good luck!

I'm doing good, feeling a little too much as if I have vacation, because everyone around me does and the weather is nice (more or less) and everyone is so relaxed but I still have to finish up my bachelor thesis (but the first version of it was received very well! so I don't have to do too much about it anymore) and I still have only (a little more than) one month left of my internship in which I have to finish my little research there too. So maybe I shouldn't be so relaxed oh well, today I relaxed (went to Ikea with my boyfriend ), so tomorrow will be a study-day (hopefully).

How is everyone else doing?



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  #177  
Old 07-23-2017, 07:29 PM
godessa97 godessa97 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kelann1027 View Post
I am now on the HCG diet. Starting Sunday I can only intake 500 Calories a day for 21 days and can only eat what it says too. From 22 days until 44 days I can then start to eat all healthy foods but only intake between 1,500 - 2,000 calories day. After this I just keep eating healthy with maybe 1 cheat food a week. I did this diet 9 years ago and lost 20 pounds. How is everyone else doing?

Hey I have only just joined the group but your story really got to me and I hope you all the best on getting better. You are an inspiration for only speaking about it let alone anything else. On the funny side your diet I would ever be able to do I love milkshakes and donuts too much! Hope you are slowly getting better
Love to you all on here
Godessa (Rebekah) xx



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  #178  
Old 07-24-2017, 12:48 PM
kelann1027 kelann1027 is offline
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Originally Posted by Vergina View Post
wow that sounds harsh! only 500 calories a day?! I could never do that XD I love food too much but I really admire you for doing that! Good luck!

I'm doing good, feeling a little too much as if I have vacation, because everyone around me does and the weather is nice (more or less) and everyone is so relaxed but I still have to finish up my bachelor thesis (but the first version of it was received very well! so I don't have to do too much about it anymore) and I still have only (a little more than) one month left of my internship in which I have to finish my little research there too. So maybe I shouldn't be so relaxed oh well, today I relaxed (went to Ikea with my boyfriend ), so tomorrow will be a study-day (hopefully).

How is everyone else doing?
Its' not as bad as it sounds. I have never eaten breakfast so , I have tea..lunch I have 5 leafs of lettuce (which is 4 cups) with pepper, 4 0z of chicken or 2 0z of tuna from the can, 6 strawberries or a baanan, 5 checkers or the tea bread (which I have 2 of). For dinner I can have 3 white eggs, 4 oz of checken, or 2 oz of tuna, also 2 oz of lean steak. with 2 cups of another veggie, grain, and a fruit. It's only for 6 weeks then I will start eating more grains and potatoes again but I will only eat no less then 1,500 Cal. and no more then 2,000 cal. in a day. This diet is made to teach you how to eat healthier without over eating. Plus I walk every day between 40 mis - 2 hours playing pokemon go! Lol. I want my weight to be at 120 pounds. I am 169 now.



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  #179  
Old 07-24-2017, 12:50 PM
kelann1027 kelann1027 is offline
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Originally Posted by godessa97 View Post
Hey I have only just joined the group but your story really got to me and I hope you all the best on getting better. You are an inspiration for only speaking about it let alone anything else. On the funny side your diet I would ever be able to do I love milkshakes and donuts too much! Hope you are slowly getting better
Love to you all on here
Godessa (Rebekah) xx
Thank You and welcome to our giuld! I hope you like it here. Any time you want to chat I am here.



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  #180  
Old 07-24-2017, 12:55 PM
kelann1027 kelann1027 is offline
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Wink Who know me the most???

I want to see how many of my Giuld friends know about me.

1. What is my favorite color?
2. What is my favorite fast food place to eat at?
3. What is my age?
4. What TV show is my favorite?

I hope everyone tries to answer them..Have fun!!



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